It means the world to me."įor me the fact that she came, but even more so the fact that she stayed, was a gift. So I tell her "Thank you for coming tonight. In Spite and because of everything I am proud of my mother.īecause there was a very real time in my life she would never under any circumstance have stepped foot into a gay anything at all. I do not cry because I have done that before and it did not make anything softer I love my mom even though I am afraid my sexuality will always be a bullet point on the long list of things about me that my mother is disgusted by. Later that night I make a point to hug her extra hard. "Just don't let anybody touch me" she's sneers, her voice more mousetrap and mouth. I've become the queen of brushing off other's judgments even if doing so has turned me into a girl made of dust "No mom actually it's too late for you to leave when the gays get here because I'm literally right here.
![gay bar lyric gay bar lyric](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/31/b0/46/31b046c69aba54ca64aeab0d4893b7e6.jpg)
In my mind I respond "But where will you go, Mom? If I were to trace every step in my life to the very beginning you are the only place I always end up." "I wanna leave when the gays get here." she complains My mother's dropped draw drags across the floor collecting lint. When we finally arrive at the Kitty Cat Club it is still daylight.
![gay bar lyric gay bar lyric](https://www.standard.co.uk/s3fs-public/thumbnails/image/2015/03/30/10/freddiemercury3003a.jpg)
I remind my mother that not every episode has to be a soap opera. The rest of my family awkwardly scolds her, each of them bracing for the clapback of femme thunder they expect from me. She displays her anger like a centerpiece at a supper table, bold and purposeful. "You guys taking me here is the equivalent of you throwing me into a tank of hungry Lions." she howlsĪnd it is not that I am offended by her statement, but I'm afraid that this is how she thinks of my love.Ī glass room of snapping mouths bearing sets of steak knives for teeth, Instead my mother accidentally throws a tantrum instead of a party. I was just hoping that when I told my mother we were on our way to a gay bar she would, I don't know. After my graduation dinner my family is on the way to celebrate at my favorite barĮverything is going surprisingly well until someone decides to interject